Embarrassed pump dangling moment! |
When wearing some clothing, I have to stash my pump deep underneath my clothes. If I wear a dress, I normally clip my pump to my underwear, and secure it underneath my tights so it is less visible (this is if my bra isn't an option). I have to access my pump to bolus, so I go to the bathroom, but often I leave myself untucked! Talk about embarrassing! It's not a big deal, but if it is a black tie event, for instance, I end up looking scruffy with my skirt tucked into my tights!
One situation that is very embarrassing is when I wear a dress, and have to stash my insulin pump in my bra. This means that every time I have an alarm on my pump (nearly every 30 minutes due to my CGM!) I have to fish around under my top, try and unhook my clip from my bra, and pull out my pump without anyone noticing! It's so embarrassing if your at a family dinner, surrounded by uncles and male relatives, and then I start fishing around in my bra, and they all get surprised and uncomfortable looks on their faces. Talk about awkward and embarrassing!
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Embarrassing fishing in bra moment! |
I get embarrassed when I can't carry out the activities that I would like to because I don't feel well enough. Having to cancel a fitness class or put off writing an essay because I just don't have the energy to make the effort to do anything.
I get embarrassed when people say to me "I'd rather die than do that".
I get embarrassed having to show my belly to check my cannula is fine.
I get embarrassed wearing a top with no sleeves so everyone can see my CGM on my arm. I often get asked, "What happened?!?"
But most of all I get embarrassed when my blood sugar is high, and I make fun of someone, or make a snide remark, or have a go at someone, which is totally unnecessary, but because I have high blood sugars, and I can't help it. My brain no longer has a filter, and I seem to say the most heartless thing I can think of. When my blood sugar returns to normal, I always have to apologise, but I always worry that one day I will say something that I can't take back.
SO If I say something to you that doesn't sound like me, it's probably because I'm high, so just ignore it and move on! And people who don't know about Type 1 Diabetes, if you don't know what something is, PLEASE KEEP ASKING QUESTIONS! Even if sometimes I get embarrassed, I'd rather people know the right facts than keep being ignorant towards the facts!
Until Next Time,
Alyssa x
Great blog Alyssa.
ReplyDeleteThank you Kev :-)
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